Loss

Recently, a childhood friend of mine lost his father. This friend is one of the most eccentric, funny, loving men that I have known. We went together on our first day of school. He grew up an introvert, me an extrovert. Somewhere along the way, we lost touch, then again, we found each other. One of those people you can open your heart to. You could meet him after years and feel like you saw him yesterday.
He grew up a nerd, did everything differently. Today, he works at CERN.

He told me last week he lost his Dad. His Appa.

I was stunned. His father was young and in good health. But life is such. This one is for you Achintya.

Achintya, I wish there was a way I could make it better for you. I know you miss Appa. I wish it wasn't meant to be this way. I wish I could hug you till the pain went away. It pains me when I see you smile through your pain, making sure others are comfortable. It hurts when I see that you can't grieve easily. I wish you would. I know how loss feels. There are still days when I wish my grandfather was here to see what I've grown to become. He taught me all that I know. There is an empty feeling. He passed away in front of me, and it hurt so much.

We all have to move on. We all don't want to.

I just wish you'd let yourself go.

I love you and will be here always.

Hugs,
me.